Love Is Blind: UK Recap: Have a Good Life

Love Is Blind UK

Week 2 (Episodes 5-8)

Season 2

Episodes 5 – 7

Editor’s Rating

4 stars

Photo: Netflix

On most nights, I sleep peacefully, swaddled in the knowledge that I am right in all things and that all of my takes are good ones. But for the past week, I will admit, I’ve been tossing and turning, haunted by a harrowing and highly specific fear: Was I wrong to say that Katisha made a mistake in picking Javen? Perish the thought!

To be clear, I stand by my initial assessment of Javen: I have an excellent radar for emotionally unavailable flakes, and he’s basically a Kellogg’s box of potential traumas. Still, who am I to decide whom Katisha should and should not love? Yes, Demola was right there, offering the romantic connection that she supposedly wanted while Javen dodged her pleas for commitment, but hey — if she wasn’t feeling it, she wasn’t feeling it.

Going into this week, I opened my heart to the possibility that Katisha sees something in Javen that I do not. Maybe she doesn’t want a guy who brings his full self to the table! But then, there was that disastrous mixer, where he started flirting with Sophie — who told him she couldn’t sit down in her dress, lest the whole room see her vagina. Javen didn’t seem to mind that mental image, and things deteriorated quickly. Suffice it to say, my sleep has been self-righteously excellent ever since. But sadly, these star-crossed lovers are not the only ones whose relationship seems ready to collapse. This season might’ve started slow, but now, the drama is in full swing.

The vibes have been dismal ever since these two left the pods. Everyone’s grilling Katisha about her sudden switch from Demola to Javen, and no matter how much Javen plays it off like he doesn’t care, he also spends a lot of time telling everyone who’ll listen that he’s not sure about Katisha. When Katisha finally tells him what she told Demola to make him feel so sure he was The One — specifically, that he “shouldn’t worry” — Javen starts to worry she’ll switch up on him as well.

But do any of us believe that that’s really why Javen won’t commit? I mean, when your own sister tells your fiancée that it’s impossible to know what you’re thinking and feeling, as Javen’s big sis Danielle does when Katisha meets his family, you know there are bigger issues. Danielle seems shocked that her baby bro is engaged, because according to her, he’s never seemed super interested in marriage before. Hmmm. 

Episode after episode, as Javen dismisses Katisha’s concerns with that smug grin on his face, it becomes increasingly obvious that they won’t make it to the wedding. The cocktail mixer is the final rupture, as Javen flirts with pod squad girlies like Sophie and Aanu while Katisha frowns in a corner. Javen’s about as subtle as a jackhammer, so of course he decides to go to an afterparty the night before he’s supposed to meet Katisha’s parents — a scenario that seems strikingly familiar to Jeramey going out drinking with Sarah Ann in LIB season 6.  What’s next, Jav and Sophie Jet-Skiing on the River Thames?

Sophie had my sympathies after her bummer break-up with Kieran, but at this point, I’m Team Megan all the way in that love triangle. When Megan sees Javen flirting up a storm and climbing into a closed photo booth with Sophie at the afterparty, she tells Katisha everything — which finally gives Katisha the courage to see that this relationship is beneath her. She leaves Javen with a note saying she can’t “marry potential,” and instead of calling her, Javen calls Kieran and Megan over to clear his name — which should tell us everything we need to know. If that’s not enough, he calls Patrick the Spleen Guy for validation. I’m with Megan on this one: “Have a good life, you fucking prick.”

Speaking of Kieran and Megan, I’m happy to report that they’re… actually adorable? Most notably, they continually sail past the moments that often create friction for LIB couples, starting with how they laugh at each other’s racy Instagram photos. When Megan isn’t ready to say “I love you,” Kieran gives her the patience she needs to feel it in her own time (which, eventually, she does). His friends warn her about his awful scrambled eggs, and she eats them anyway, and when he makes her the world’s strangest bouquet — sunflowers sprouting out of a bunch of roses — she treasures the gesture in all its unaesthetic glory, telling him it’s “quite unique.” Even when he shows her his gaming setup, she is undeterred, and that, my friends, is a sign of true bravery.

As a major proponent of the Samantha Jones Theory of Relational Happiness, I’m inclined to take all Kieran and Megan’s constant laughter as a very good sign. And as if all of that wasn’t encouraging enough, Kieran also backs Megan up when she confronts Javen for misbehaving at the mixer, despite his own friendship with Javen. That was what sealed it for me. I can’t wait to see their synchronized dance routine at the wedding, and if they don’t say “I do,” I’ll have been wrong about them twice — a fate that I simply cannot abide.

I don’t know about this one. On one hand, these two claim to have found a connection the likes of which neither has experienced before. On the other hand, why can they never articulate the source of that connection?

When Sarover’s skeptical mother asks Kal what he sees in her daughter, he says he liked her accent and that they’re both into fitness. I swear I could see Sarover’s sister’s soul leaving her body at that exact moment. Equally terrible: Kal complimenting Sarover’s appearance, grinning at her mother, and telling her, “Good work.” Ugh.

And yet, somehow, that meal ended with a tentative seal of approval — which is extra shocking because she’d spent the days preceding the meet-up sending lengthy screeds of disapproval via text message. Maybe these two will make it, and maybe they won’t. Kal’s brother sure seems skeptical that he can handle long-term commitment, which is never a good sign. But, hey — at least we’ve all now seen the confounding, carbo-loaded culinary creation that is the “Wigan Kebab,” essentially a pie within a sandwich. For that privilege alone, I’ll say this courtship was worthwhile no matter how it ends.

I wanted to root for this one, but Billy seems constitutionally incapable of marrying a flight attendant. On top of his hesitation around Ashleigh’s job in the pods, also reveals that upon leaving for the experiment, Billy said he’d be fine as long as he didn’t meet any flight attendants — and that if he did, he’d be back in a matter of weeks. Yikes.

If this relationship were an aircraft, it’s starting to look like one of those Boeing 737s with the doors flying off mid-flight. And it’s not just Ashleigh’s job that’s causing problems, either. It’s also Billy’s career as a Royal Army Physical Training Corps instructor. Being a military man has given Billy a very, erm, specific relationship with food. Euphemistically, we might use the word he and Ashleigh often use — “regimented.” Personally, I’d call it “obnoxious.” While grocery shopping with Ashleigh for the first time, Billy informs her that they’ll never keep sweet snacks in the house, which understandably gives her some anxiety. She does not want to live on broccoli, mince meat, and rice, and honestly, that feels like a very fair ask.

As with most of their conflicts, Billy and Ashleigh talk this through, but only time will reveal if they can put the verbal compromise into practice. In the end, she’s devastated to hear that he’s only 50-50 on getting married, because she’s 100 percent ready, to which I say, really? We’ll see how she feels after their next trip to the grocery store.

I’m beginning to worry that these two are gonna break my heart. I want them to work so badly, but the cracks are starting to show. He tends to be dominant in relationships, and she likes to maintain her “independence.” While they’ve said they’re willing to compromise, Billy and Ashleigh can tell them a thing or two about how hard that can actually be in practice.

Also, everyone who meets Jed and Bardha keeps pointing out that they’ve never argued. I’m getting the sense that Bardha doesn’t like or know how to handle conflict, which will certainly be a problem down the road. One cannot sustain a relationship through good cooking and cute gestures alone; communication is also key. Although Jed and Bardha share strong family values and a mutual desire to have children as soon as possible, there’s a chance that when the bubble bursts and things get real, this cozy relationship could collapse.

Then again, looking ahead in the season preview, it seems like everyone’s about to fall apart at the altar. Katisha and Javen obviously don’t make it, and the four couples who remain are all in tears by the end. Megan’s looking unsure while saying her vows, Bardha’s crying into her best friend’s shoulder, and Billy is telling his mother he’s going to be selfish and that he hopes Ashleigh can “forgive” him. We’ll see which of these singles (if any) are crying out of joy, but based on this highly dramatic edit, things are not looking good for anyone.